[HoE] Physicist's Bill of Rights

[Allan Seyberth <darious@darious.com>]

Sounds more like Junkers to me....


The Physicists' Bill of Rights

(Author Unknown) 



We hold these postulates to be intuitively obvious, that all physicists
are born equal, to a first approximation, and are
endowed by their creator with certain discrete privileges, among them a
mean rest life, n degrees of freedom, and the
following rights which are invariant under all linear transformations: 

1. To approximate all problems to ideal cases. 

2. To use order of magnitude calculations whenever deemed necessary (i.e.
   whenever one can get away with it). 

3. To use the rigorous method of "squinting" for solving problems more
   complex than the addition of positive real integers. 

4. To dismiss all functions which diverge as "nasty" and "unphysical." 

5. To invoke the uncertainty principle when confronted by confused
   mathematicians, chemists, engineers, psychologists, dramatists, und
   andere schweinhund. 

6. When pressed by non-physicists for an explanation of (4) to mumble in a
   sneering tone of voice something about physically naive mathematicians. 

7. To equate two sides of an equation which are dimensionally
   inconsistent, with a suitable comment to the effect of, "Well,
   we are interested in the order of magnitude anyway."
 
8. To invent fictitious forces to delude the general public. 

9. To justify shaky reasoning on the basis that it gives the right answer. 

10. To cleverly choose convenient initial conditions, using the principle
    of general triviality. 

11. To use plausible arguments in place of proofs, and thenceforth refer
    to these arguments as proofs. 

12. To take on faith any principle which seems right but cannot be proved. 


==========================
	
-------------------
Allan Seyberth
darious@darious.com

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Barney Fyfe: 
Now Andy, let me tell you a thing or two about chickens.
Chickens cross roads in those other counties, but not here in Mayberry.
No chicken crosses no roads in Mayberry without Deputy Fyfe knowing about
it!