Forwarded to me by my cousin; thought y'all might enjoy it! << For all Dog's who are people owners: I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff. I do not need tosuddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge. I must shake therainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house. I will not eat thecats' food, before or after they eat it. I will stop trying to findthe few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about tothrow up. I will not throw up in the car. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc. I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop. "Kitty box crunchies"are not food. I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end. I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV. I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard with it. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car registration. >>
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- To: KGHUBGAS@aol.com, babarmom@webtv.net
- Subject: Fwd:
- From: Silvrjimmy@aol.com
- Date: Thu, 14 Jan 1999 21:34:54 EST
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- To: Silvrjimmy@aol.com
- From: Kingen@webtv.net (David Kingen)
- Date: Thu, 14 Jan 1999 07:45:05 -0600 (CST)
For all Dog's who are people owners: I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet. The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff. I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table. I will not roll my toys behind the fridge. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house. I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it. I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the house when I am about to throw up. I will not throw up in the car. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc. I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop. "Kitty box crunchies" are not food. I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard after processing. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end. I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them. I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging. When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside. We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV. I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard with it. The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps. My head does not belong in the refrigerator. I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car registration. -------------------- <html><center><img reload=1 src="http://counter.telecom.at/allworld/Count.cgi?display=clock&timezone=CDT-0 565&ft=4&frgb=ffbec7&frgb=CC3FF&prgb=ffbec7&dd=A"height="30"><font color="gold"size="3"><br>CST</font></center> </html>