[PyrNet-L] Chat: Too Funny! I am making all my dogs read this!!!

[Kiradaw@aol.com]

Doggie Pledges 
I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff. 
I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the
coffee table. 

I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house. 
I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it. 
I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of dry carpet in the
house when I am about to throw up. 

I will not throw up in the car. 
I will not scootch my bottom along the grass (grass, heck, what about
the carpet!!) to rid myself of hangers-on. 

I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc. 
I will not eat other animals' poop. 
I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop. 
I will not roll my head around in other animals' poop. 
"Kitty box crunchies" are not food. 

I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard
after processing. 

The diaper pail is not a cookie jar. 
I will not eat the disposable diapers, especially the dirty ones. 
I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end. 
I will not chew my humans' toothbrushes and not tell them. 
I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my
people will think I am hemorrhaging. 
When in the car, I will not insist on having the window down when it's
raining outside. 

I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of someone who is
sitting on the toilet. 

We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV. 
I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard
with it. 

The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps. 
My head does not belong in the refrigerator. 
I will stop licking food tastes of dirty dishes being placed into the
dishwasher. 

I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's
license and car registration. 


Debbie and the Pyr gang